Alarmingly Nice Taxi Driver Who's Also An Asshole

  • Taxi Driver: Hi boy, how was your night? How did you get here? Did you just dropped your girlfriend off?
  • Me: Nope. I was doing research for an article.
  • Taxi Driver: Oh! So you are a writer? How nice. Pays badly though.
  • Me: It's okay... I love what I do.
  • Taxi Driver: Then, that's important. It's important to love what you do. To find contentment in your work... that's important. But when you decide to have a family, that's when you'll regret it.
  • Me: What?
  • Taxi Driver: I like your hair. Did you just got it cut?
  • Me: Thanks, and yes, I did.
  • Taxi Driver: So thick, like a doormat.
  • Me: ....
  • Taxi Driver: You've got a big head, it fits your look. How old are you?
  • Me: 30?
  • Taxi Driver: Ah! Good age! Neither here nor there.
  • Me: I don't think I want to talk to you anymore.
I have a little over 100ml of alcohol in my system, do I need to be in a ziplock bag before I take the flight?
Depending on our environment, we either play it cool or play it safe or play it nothing. I say fuck your environment and do what you want, no one will remember you riding in a shopping cart down Orchard Road. If you’re on the piss, at least that’s off your bucket list. If you’re in the press, at least you got a clipping.
My grass is greener than your other side, baby.
It is not your perception of reality that defines you, it is your perception of yourself that defines your reality.
If you have a shadow of a doubt, you are basking in the wrong sun.
My consciousness comes from my sauce.
When the Medusa of inactivity looks me in the eye, I will turn to stone.
I am glad to say I didn’t tell you so.
I am a jack off of all trades and masturbates none.